Ok, so its not the most attractive title, but it’s not my quote… “Ditch Bitch” is the self appointed name given to a woman named Judy who has taken the lead with the unincorporated ditch that runs through the property.

This morning I went to the mosquito infested property to propose my idea of moving the ditch about 20 ft. north in a 100 ft. section to give me some more workable space for the house foundation. I met with Judy X (name eludes me) and Paul Nezlanic (sp?). Paul is an old ranch had fellow who knows the lay of the land and the water rights in the area. I have no water rights, but the ditch runs through the property.

We walked the ditch, discussed its condition, where I would move it and what part would be pipped. After some back and forth, they realized this was NOT the Slough Ditch, but a part of the Banning Lateral. In other words, it was a secondary ditch that is a seasonal overflow route. Well, that made all the difference in the world!

Afterwards, I went out to Rose Ln. to inspect a culvert diameter that Paul encouraged me to use. Their I met an older red pickup truck. It was classic- the woman in the driver’s seat was smoking her fifth cigarette of the day (it was 8:30am) and seemed to have a few broken teeth! Her friend was a guy who looked to be in his sixties, but was probably late 40’s. His bulbous, veiny nose revealed a lifetime of hard drinking.

The upshot of the whole affair- I can move the ditch…

Now I just need to get it in writing, or should I blow that off and just get a handshake? That’s more like how I’d like to handle it.